she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
