everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
