So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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