I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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