I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
