I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I came so hard my ears popped.
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