chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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