Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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