You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize