I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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