David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
It's never too late to be topless.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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