U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Randomize
