im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
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