I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
