should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
