Sponge bath it is.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
