the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize