I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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