Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
