Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
