a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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