guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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