cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize