Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
This house was built for laser tag.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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