Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
