he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
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