I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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