I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
