the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize