so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
