the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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