You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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