He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
