now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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