My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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