perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
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Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
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God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
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