"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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