At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.