Got a toothbrush?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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