If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
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