I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
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He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
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Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
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