She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize