So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Randomize
