Sry I called you an 8
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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