i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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