You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
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I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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