Do you still have your period?
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
