I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
