i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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