my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Randomize
